Buzzzz
by Bookbug Taz
Summary: When Scully starts to see the effects of the treatments, what will she do?


The X-Files and the fantastic characters are not now, nor will ever be mine. They are the property of Chris Carter and the Fox Network. I am just taking them out to play for a bit.

Slight Mulder/Scully

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah." She sighed. "I have been having the treatments for a while now and I thought I had escaped it, but the last couple of mornings...." Her voice trailed away and she shut her eyes briefly. When she opened them again, Mulder saw a new resolve in her. "I made up my mind a long time ago that if this ever happened that I wouldn't cling to it. If it is going to go, then damn it _I_ am going to be the one to do it."

She held his eyes and looked into them expecting to see denial, horror even at what she was suggesting. Instead she just saw love, anguish, which was to be expected, and support, shining out at her. She gave him a small smile which grew to a grin to match his as he said, "You know what.... I have always wanted to do this!"

She looked surprised for a minute. Then she grabbed up the clippers from her kitchen table and laughed. "You know what.... so have I!"

Now it was his turn to look surprised. She settled on the stool and drew an old table cloth round her shoulders. "Really?" He pulled her shoulder length hair out from the cloth and brushed it through with his fingers. He could see what she meant. The long strands that came out with his fingers cut him to his heart. He too had been expecting this but, like her, had almost managed to convince himself that she was not going to lose her hair. Now that she was, it was somehow more of a confirmation that she had cancer than anything else. While she was tired and did not have the stamina she once had, there were no obvious signs that she was seriously ill..... until now.

He started as she put her hand on his cheek. He hadn't realised he had zoned out and now he looked into her eyes and saw his thoughts reflected there. "I know" she whispered to him. "It's somehow more real now, isn't it? There were some days that I'd wake up, go to work and it was only when something reminded me, that I suddenly thought 'oh – I have cancer'. Yesterday when I brushed my hair and there was so much hair on the brush, I didn't know what to do. This morning when the same thing happened, I just knew."

She took a breath and looked him in the eye. "I have cancer. My hair is falling out. But I am not going to just sit around and let it happen to me. I still have control over my life. I am fighting the cancer with chemo and the cancer cannot take my hair if I have decided to do it first!"

With her eyes still locked on his, Scully raised the clippers and pushed them through the hair just above her ear. Red locks fell to the floor and she did it again, a little higher and again until the side of her head was bare except for a thin covering of stubble.

Mulder realised he had been holding his breath, let it out and smiled. "You learn to give those pep talks at medical school? You could teach the army a thing or two."

She smiled and he shuddered. God she's sexy as hell when she's like this. He couldn't take his eyes off her. "So, you've always wanted to do this? Seems a bit out of character _Dr_ Scully" His voice shook slightly as he tried to steer the conversation onto a lighter subject.

She snorted "I haven't always been a doctor you know. I was a rebellious teenager once upon a time."

He lifted his hand to the shaved side of her head. "And you wanted to shave your head?"

Scully looked at him and then looked away in thought. "I wanted to know what it would be like. I always thought it would be kind of freeing, you know what I mean? I was always the mature one, the sensible one, the studious one and I always thought that there were so many expectations piled up on me that to shave my hair would be a release. A release of what society and family expected. Something to show them that I am my own person and not just what they thought I was." She smiled. "Of course I was also trying to catch the eye of a boy who was into punk and had a Mohican."

Mulder raised his eyebrow. "A Mohican? Bet your mom was thrilled when she found out!"

Scully giggled at the thought. "Well, we moved before anything could come of it and once I had started in a new place, it was back to the normal routine and trying to fit in as 'the new girl'. I figured that if I shaved my head, that wouldn't really help me make friends." She sighed theatrically. "Oh the pressures of society!"

Mulder grinned too. "Speaking of which, are you going to finish or just have a kind of half and half approach?"

Scully raised the clippers. "You want a go?"

He took them from her with a smile. "I have always thought that a girl with a shaved head was kind of courageous." He lifted the clippers to the other side of her head and gently started to shave. "You are right that society expects girls to have long hair and I think it says something about the character of a person to deliberately buck the trend and go in the other direction." He watched her hair fall as he dragged the clipper around her ear.

"A kindred spirit." Scully smiled as she sat on the stool.

"Speaking of Mohicans, do you want to do the top?"

Scully picked up the mirror from the table and looked at the reflection. At first glance you couldn't see the shaved sides as the hair from the top of her head covered it. She lifted the middle and her face broke into a grin at the effect. "What do you think Skinner would say if I went in like this?"

Her partner laughed. "I think he would be jealous. You still have more hair than he has had for many years."

Scully's smile faltered slightly as she remembered the reason behind the buzz. "Well, at least for now." Mulder's arms slipped around her from behind and held her tightly against his chest.

"You will beat this Scully. You will be back to work in no time. And when your hair grows back, I won't care if you grow it out or keep it like this. It is you that I think is beautiful and it is you that I l...love." His eyes locked on hers in the mirror and he smiled at the love he saw shining back at him.

She squeezed his hands and let her head fall back against his chest for a minute. "Come on then, lets finish this." She raised the clippers to the top of her head and paused, a moment of insecurity pushing its way out. "You sure you won't be embarrassed to be seen in public with me?"

Mulder laughed. "Me? Embarrassed? To be seen out with a beautiful and striking woman?" He impulsively took the clippers from her and raised them to his own head. "Would you be embarrassed to be seen with me?" He quickly pushed them through the hair above his ear and repeated it until he was a mirror of his smaller partner.

She laughed. "You are crazy Mulder! What did you do that for?"

"What? I can't let you have all the fun!" He smiled and then looked her in the eyes and his face turned serious again. "I love you. I have wondered what would happen if you lost your hair cos of the treatment. Some people go for head scarves, some people stay inside, there are wigs and things like that. I wondered what approach you would take and I decided that I would support you in that. You are not your hair Scully, just as I am not mine. I decided that if you lost your hair, I would shave mine so that you knew just how much I want to support you."

He brushed the tears from Scully's eyes. "They'd better be tears of love and not horror at my naked head cos it's too late now!" He smiled as she grabbed him into a tight hug.

"Of course they are tears of love you ..... you." She pulled back and the smile she gave him broke his heart. "You are a wonderful man Fox William Mulder." He shuffled his feet in embarrassment and took the clippers from him. "But you are not going to shave your head before me."

She reached up again to the top of her head and this time there was no hesitation. The hair fell to the floor and she smiled at his reflection behind her. When she looked at herself in the mirror, she laughed and ran her hand over her head, enjoying the feel of the stubble on her scalp. Mulder took the clippers and finished off the back where she couldn't reach easily. When he was done, he took a soft towel and wiped it over her head and neck, removing the itchier hairs.

Without a word she stood up and led Mulder to the stool. He sat down and she took the clippers again. "You sure? Please don't feel that you have to do this for me. I love you too.... whether you have hair or not." She winked at him and he chuckled.

"Go for it Scully."

She ran the clippers over his head. Finishing off the scruffy runs he had made earlier and cutting the top so that when she finally turned the machine off, his head was as smooth as her own. She took up the towel and wiped the hair from his head and neck and when she was done, planted a kiss right in the middle of his freshly shaved scalp. Mulder jumped in surprise. "Wow! That feels weird. I've never had anyone kiss me there before. Even when I was a baby I had thick hair."

They stood together and looked in the mirror. "I don't know Scully, I think your head is much cuter than mine."

She smiled. "I like your head. It's very ......." She burst out laughing. "Oh Mulder! Imagine going in to work like this. They would think we were pod people or something!"

Mulder laughed and pulled her to his chest. "Well, I'm sure they all thought we went mad years ago so they probably wouldn't be too shocked. We can try it if you like?"

Scully smiled against him and snuggled closer. "I think I'll skip that today. Let's start small like a coffee shop or something."

"I can do that. But I think we might need to clean up first."

As Scully jumped in the shower to rid herself of those itchy hairs, Mulder found the dustpan and brush and swept the floor. As he put away the clippers and returned the mirror to the wal, he felt an arm go around his waist and a hand stroke the top of his head.

"You know, we are going to save so much money on shampoo!"

"Always the economist!"

"It's all those horrible expenses forms you always conveniently left me with. Now hurry up and shower so we can go out and see how many people stare at us." She pushed Mulder into the bathroom and gathered her bag together. As she stood in the lounge, she looked again in the mirror and rubbed her head. It was a big change but she kind of liked it. She was like a soldier and this was her declaration of war. A war that she was determined to win.

"You ready?"

She looked over at her partner, looked back at herself and smiled. "Bring it on."


End file.
